


Again

by deadfvrst



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Drabble, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-07-29 02:12:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7666345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadfvrst/pseuds/deadfvrst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'm done."</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"I'm done."</p><p>Dean looks up from the gun and rag in his hands, setting them down on the table. His eyes meet Cas' in pregnant silence.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Again

"I'm done."

"What?"

"I'm done."

Dean looks up from the gun and rag in his hands, setting them down on the table. His eyes meet Cas' in pregnant silence.

"Done," Dean repeats, "...with what?"

Cas opens his mouth one, two, three times. Running a hand down his face, he sighs. Something so incredibly worn, human, it hurts.

"I'm done with this," the gesture is vague.

Another pause.

"This?", Dean tries again.

"This.", says Cas, "This idling. Beating around the bush, if you will. I...I'm not stupid Dean."

"Neither am I. But if I'm honest I'm feeling pretty dumb not picking up whatever you're putting out, so spill. What is 'this'?"

Cas sits down finally, across from Dean. He leans back against the chair, staring straight up.

"Have you ever been in love?"

Dean's eyes widen, taken aback.

"Uh...yeah, I guess. A couple of times, maybe."

"And, can you recall what it's like to decipher those feelings for what they are? Describe them?"

"It's...I guess it's sort of scary. Y'know monsters, demons, inevitable annual apocalypse I can do, but emotions? Top of the Shitting Myself list. I, and don't get me wrong, I've always wanted something like that but the time and commitment it takes to make it work is just something I'm not allowed to have. And the amount of people that have suffered because of me, I never realized it when I was younger but, they're all dead. Really dead, never coming back. And maybe it's my toxic world perception but there's no possible future for something like that, not without someone else getting hurt. So, no. I can't describe it."

Pause.

Shift.

Cas is sitting beside Dean now. Hands clasped tightly on the table top. His stare is something strong, radiating weight.

"I can."

"Hm?"

"I can describe it."

They're facing each other.

"It's a little like flight. Think, being on a plane. But the turbulence is the thing you feel every time they smile. The sensation you get when you share prolonged eye contact, or get to touch their shoulder. The excitement when you can feel the longing or radiation of their soul. Not having a doubt in your mind you'd die for each other."

Dean coughs.

"That's, uh...kinda specific there, Cas."

"I was thinking..."

"Yeah?"

"Would it be so bad if maybe there was some connection?"

"How do you mean?"

"Perhaps if the intended partner had experience with your lifestyle. Someone you may not have to worry about, who could defend herself. Wouldn't mind when work came first."

"I mean...yeah, yeah that could work. But it'd still be complicated, how does romance fit in? Kids? Experience? Compatibility? Connection?"

"Hm."

Pause.

Silence.

Cas sighs, glances up as Dean does. He decides something then:

"Fuck it."

"Huh?"

"Dean Winchester, I'm in love with you. Date me."

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"Yeah."

"Yes."

"Okay."

"Good."

"Great."

 

end

 


End file.
